MondayMindset Of A Hippie-Chick: People Come,People Go-The Inevitable

Over this past year I've experienced the entire gamut of emotions.  From extreme highs; publishing my debut memoir - to debilitating lows; burying my last parent.  Yes, it's been quite a year, and it's not even over!  But I know life works like that, so I'm never too surprised when I'm temporarily taken off-guard by its unpredictability.  
But one thing that is hard to get used to:  The people who seem destined to come-and-go in our lives.
 
I've always believed you meet everyone in your life for a reason - whether it's for your benefit or their's, or perhaps a mutual need to be fulfilled.  What I am having a hard time with is accepting some will not hang around forever, including family - the hardest to fathom.
I often make reference to the two 'D's that will be the end-all in most relationships - death or divorce. The divorce one I'm more than familiar with, but this death one is new to a degree...and it's a stinker.  Not only are you separated from the loved one who has died, very often their family goes with them too.
 
When you divorce, more than likely it's not just the person you're married to that you'll be saying good-bye to, it's the whole brood - that's almost a given.  I still miss all my ex's families!  Sure I hear through the grapevine (my son) how they would LOVE for me to drop by if I'm ever in town...but you both know you never will. (Can you say 'awkward?') 
But this summer I've had to come to the realization that I've probably hugged my own relatives for the last time too - at my father's funeral.  My aunts and uncles from both sides of the family were there, many I hadn't seen, well, since my mother's funeral in 2005.  It was great to see everyone, but bittersweet at the same time. I live 1000 miles from them, and not being a very close-knit family, I know in my heart that encounter was more than likely my last with that eclectic group.  Unless one of my younger siblings die before I do - and has a traditional burial - I do not see myself heading north, towards that area, anyways.  Sure, you trade phone numbers and emails, but over time all that gets lost in the shuffle of our everyday, as life goes on, suddenly without them in it.

THEN my sister announces plans for her departure from HER marriage! Another one bites the dust!  Now I'm glad I hugged my brother-in-law  (whom I've known for more than 25 years)  and thanked him for all he has done for my family during my dad's long, drawn out illness, when I was up there for his funeral - as that was probably my last encounter with him as well. 

So a lot of changes this year, to say the least. Out with the old crowd, in with the new?  I don't know.  I can only hope life has a plan for me with another crop of good people to surround me - I am hopeful it does.  But then I remind myself, 'Never say never', a phrase I recite often.  After 30+ years, I never thought I'd reunite with my first love  - the one my memoir is written about - but because of that project, I did...so sometimes we DO get a second chance.  

Maybe that's the true life-lesson here - the relationships that are meant to stand the test of time, will...IF we put the effort into them. 

Every death has a birth to mirror it, as nothing is forever - including loved ones.  
Appreciate all who surround you in your everyday, tomorrow might be too late. 
And if that person is special enough, I bet you'll find a way to keep them IN your life. I hope you do, I hope I do too.
~~~

Thank you for stopping by for my thoughts of the day...and if you get a chance, please check out my memoir, 'The Gifted Ones' at the top of my page, for THAT relationship was one worth holding onto.
Have a Happy Monday!
Peace Out.




In memory of my mom and dad